maylands - coles
a big ugly coles that sucks to look at but is fair enough to exist.
inside you can buy your household staples:
- oats
- oat milk
- rice cakes
- peanut butter
- instant coffee
- milky bar kit kat if on special
- muesli if on special
- orange juice if sick
these are the only things i ever buy from coles. i don't know what a healthy body feels like.
i got temporarily banned here for stealing the pick'n'mix. normally i just take one or two chocolate pretzels so that i don't feel the need to buy something with ten times the sugar, but one day i was feeling rather brazen and took a whole scoop and slid the candy into the pocket of my smoker's jacket. then an older coles worker pointed at me and went "UPP" and i walked away but she followed me and made me empty my pocket and they all spilt onto the floor. then i had to pay for them. if i'd known i was gonna have to pay i wouldnt have taken so many. now because i am a buddhist, i never steal.
TO THE NORTH: kfc
TO THE EAST: civic video
TO THE SOUTH: suicide flats
TO THE WEST: the elvis puppet